Category Archives: Life

Tipping: When And How Much

Posted on May 29, 2012 | 3 comments

I do a fair amount of domestic moving about.  In fact, I just got back from a short trip this weekend.  And for awhile now I’ve been struck by how many occasions I’m called upon to tip.  And I’m just beside myself for feeling out of touch.

For much of my working life I’ve been supported by tips.  I bussed tables in college and then moved on to a banquet server.  Later I became a bartender during school and then, in Seattle, I earned my complete living as a bartender for 4+ years.  I consider myself “in tune” with the tip’ed population but admit to now being confused.

So, here are some times off the top of my head that call for tipping:

  • Waiter/waitress – Bartender
  • Coffee barista
  • Taxi driver
  • Tipping the maid service when checking out of a hotel
  • Bell hop up and then down
  • Bell hop calling for the car valet
  • The car valet
  • Dry cleaner
  • To Go check out at restaurants
  • Bathroom attendants
  • Car wash attendant
  • Truck delivery guys when you purchase a washer/dryer from Sears
  • Pizza delivery guy

And I’m sure there’s more.

In many of these cases I’m not sure that tipping is warranted, in the others, I’m at a loss for how much to tip.  I just totally admit to not knowing.

You?

 

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Posted in Life, Raising Men

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Where Is Pino

Posted on May 17, 2012 | 2 comments

I have largely been absent for the last week or so.  I am spending most of my non-work time organizing a BBQ fundraiser here in Raleigh.

We are selling BBQ plates to raise money for a local charity:

PLM Families Together is developing a new housing service that moves families directly from homelessness into housing or from other shelters into housing. Rather than having families move from shelter program to shelter program in today’s times when the short term stay at shelters is not enough for family stabilization, we will focus on stable housing first. Once housed, we will continue to work with the family for 12 months, helping them learn the skills for budgeting and working with landlords that is needed to maintain that housing. Housing first reduces the number of transitions for the family. Initial rental subsidy will be available for housing and will gradually decrease as families meet their goals; a less expensive model than renting our own apartments.

Additionally, we are selling tickets that will donate a plate to Urban Ministries of Durham.

Urban Ministries of Durham (UMD) welcomes approximately more than 6,000 people each year who come seeking food, shelter, clothing and supportive services.

UMD is the point of entry, triage and emergency services in the Durham homelessness continuum of care network.  Our programs are designed to:

  • Help prevent homelessness by providing food and clothing to offset living expenses and by referring guests to others in the community who may be able to provide additional help;
  • Assist those who are homeless by providing emergency shelter, stabilization assistance such as recovery programs and medical referrals, and  to help them connect with the resources that will enable them to return to stable housing as quickly as possible;
  • Foster collaboration with community partners so that coordinated efforts can provide needed  longer term housing and supportive service needs; and
  • Offer support with dignity and compassion to neighbors in need, regardless of  their ability to leave homelessness at the time.

It’s been very busy and challenging, but the event will be held this weekend.  I  can’t wait to see the whole of the experience result in success.

By the way, if you’re interested in participating, I have the ability to sell tickets through PayPal and you can contribute to the donation of a plate of Carolina BBQ to the folks over at UMD.  Just drop me a note in the comments or e-mail me at:

pino.online@gmail.com

I hope to resume more full time blogging very soon!

 

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Posted in Life, Raising Men

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When Mean People Are Discriminated Against

Posted on April 30, 2012 | Leave a comment

Bullies don’t need a reason.  And they don’t care that it hurts.  And they enjoy what they do.

Sometimes bullies bully because they are bigger.  Or because they are better at things like football.  Or because they are pretty.  Or because they aren’t doing as well in school.

Or because THEY were bullied.

Dan Savage is a bully.  What he does he does out of a vindictive mindset.  He uses words to hurt people.  And just because he says he’s sorry doesn’t mean it’s okay.

(CNN) – Columnist and gay-rights advocate Dan Savage is standing by his comment that “we can learn to ignore the bulls**t in the Bible about gay people” at a recent conference for high school students, a line that prompted some to walk out and spurred intense online debate.

…

Some Christian students walked out of the Seattle speech, prompting another controversial line from Savage: “It’s funny to someone who is on the receiving end of beatings that are justified by the Bible how pansya**ed people react when you push back.”

Savage apologized for that specific remark in Sunday’s blog post, writing that his word choice “was insulting, it was name-calling, and it was wrong.”

Mr. Savage is no different than those who have bullied people all over the world through all of time.  And the fact that he has been bullied doesn’t change that fact.

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Posted in Faith, Idiots on Parade, Life

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Life Views

Posted on April 26, 2012 | Leave a comment

I mostly try to boil problems down to their simplest form.  This may explain why so many people feel I’m so wrong so often.  However, in life I find that this way of looking at, and then handling, problems has been rather successful for me.

Over time it has become more of a lifestyle than a management technique.

  1. Identify we have a problem.  This is harder than it may seem.
  2. Be very clear what it is that is making people mad or upset.
  3. Quit doing that thing in #2 while still allowing forward positive movement.

My problem with the various groups of people who self identify as “liberal” is that they either stop at #1 or skip #2 altogether while failing to continue moving forward.

This sums up my feelings perfectly.

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Posted in Fun, Life, Politics: National

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Some GOOD News

Posted on April 25, 2012 | Leave a comment

I have to remember that it wasn’t all that long ago I was one of those folks in the world that didn’t pay attention to all this stuff.  I’ve always been able to name the President and the Vice-President but beyond that….not so much.  Secretary of State?  Speaker or Senate Majority Leader?  No way.

So, when I discuss this new found hobby with folks, many of ’em don’t know what I’m talking about.  Or even care.

And then I wonder that if they aren’t plugged into my world is it possible that I’m missing theirs?  That I’m so concerned with the shit that is all things politics I’m missing the much of the point; that is .. life?

Maybe.

I saw this story and sat back.  Maybe it’s all just okay.

APEX, N.C. —

A Middle Creek High School student with leukemia had his wish granted by the Make-A-Wish foundation, but he didn’t ask for a trip to Disney World.

Instead, Rashawn King asked that the entire students, faculty and staff of his high school get a free lunch in thanks for their support of him during his illness. King has acute lymphoblastic leukemia.

So the entire school – 1,900 people – get a free lunch Thursday. The lunches will be provided starting at 10:30 a.m. Thursday. Chick-fil-A is providing the lunches.

Kristen Mercer Johnson, the president of the Eastern North Carolina Make-A-Wish foundation, said the group was “truly honored to be able to grant Rashawn’s wish.”

This program is built to grant a wish to a kid.  To give them something that they may not otherwise ever have the opportunity to have.  Cars, visits from professional athletes and even trips.  This young man didn’t want that.

“It speaks to the character of this young man who decided to use his wish to thank the Middle Creek High School community,” she said.

Indeed.

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Posted in Life, Raising Men

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Friendship, Morality and Brotherly Love

Posted on April 22, 2012 | 2 comments

The tenants of a Master Mason.

In a world so eager to differentiate one from another based on politics or faith is it any wonder that we see war and conflict all around the globe?  Where we see walls rather than bridges?

It is with no small amount of honor and satisfaction that in a region dominated by the differences of Arab and Jew we see the peaceful association and love and admiration from one to another in a Free Mason’s lodge:

A Greek Orthodox Palestinian Arab, Nadim Mansour, has been installed in Tel Aviv as Grand Master of the Grand Lodge of the State of Israel, a position he will hold until 2013.
Israel has had two previous Palestinian Arab Grand Masters – Yakob Nazee (1933-1940) and Jamil Shalhoub (1981-1982).
Nadim Mansour, who was born in Haifa but moved to Acre aged five, was initiated – as a Lewis – into Lodge Akko in 1971, of which his father Elias was a founder, and in 1980 became its Master. He also has the rank of 33rd Degree in the Ancient and Accepted Rite.
Currently, the Grand Lodge has about 1,200 members in 56 lodges, working in ten languages – Hebrew, Arabic, English, French, Hungarian, Rumanian, Turkish, Russian, German and Spanish – and five different religions.

As the governments of the region prepare for war, Free Masons continue to do what they always do, rejoice in the sublime existence of a love between one brother and another.

It will not be until the world can follow the example f the gentle Mason and leave the differences of the profane world outside the door of the temple and agree that all man can find reason TO agree.

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Posted in Faith, Life, Politics: International, Raising Men

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Feeding The Birds

Posted on April 22, 2012 | 2 comments

 

I have grown up to be my father.  I enjoy, hell, I LOVE to enjoy, feeding my birds and watching ’em play around the feeders, trees, shrubs and nesting boxes.  I love this.

And in the true economic spirit, I take much glee in pointing out to my birds there is no such thing as a free lunch.

[promoslider category=”general” width=”600px” height=”700px”]

I labor for the money that I use to buy the food the birds eat.  For them, this represents  free lunch.  However, the birds live in a world that’s not always so nice.  See, the birds are subject to the predators that feed on them.  And in several cases I’ve been resting on my deck when all of a sudden there’s a horrible racket in the bushes off to the side.  I look over and see Mr. Hawk fly away with a very sad little bird in his mouth.

The other morning I came down stairs to find ‘ol Mr. Hawk resting ON MY DECK!  I ran to get the camera and I was actually able to get a pair of shots as he was waiting around for his next breakfast meal.

Now, I am conflicted.  I like my birds and when the hawk is around they fly away and hide.  On the other hand, if what I’m doing is faatening up hawk food so that I am able to enjoy my pet hawk….well, that’s pretty cool too.

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Posted in Fun, Life

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People Who Are Bad At Money Don’t Have Money

Posted on April 17, 2012 | 8 comments

Poverty in the United States is a problem.  When folks are poor they are less healthy, receive less education and are more likely to raise children who are poor themselves.  And there are a lot of noble efforts to curb poverty in the US.  Much of that effort is, of course, centered on taking money from people who have it and giving it to other people who don’t.

There are schools of thought that say, “The wealthy are able to give their children unfair advantages.  We need to remedy this unfairness by proxy; giving money to the children of the poor.”

Not surprisingly, I don’t agree with this.

Continue reading →

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Posted in Idiots on Parade, Life, Middle Class

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The Best Of Times

Posted on April 15, 2012 | 1 comment


Watching the Twins today. Had a great moment with my 6 year-old kid. Earlier in the weekend we began exploring what a batting average is. I explained it this way:

If Jeter has an average of .312 it means that if he has 1,000 chances to get a hit or get an out, he gets a hit 312 times.

As we watched the Twins some freakin’ guy named Clete steps to the plate for the hometown 9.  The child laughs at Clete’s .000 AVG 0 HRS 0 RBIS line.  Just as I say, “If  ‘ol Clete here were to get 1,000 chances to get a hit, he’d get ZERO of ….”

And then the bastard goes yard on me. Me boy fell out laughing. How cool is it that he got that?

Then he asked me if I thought the Twins would win now that we were up 3-2. I said, “No.” He said, “Why not daddy?” to which I replied, “Cause we’re a horrible ballclub son.”

He just nodded and said, “Yup.”

I just saw that we lost 4-3.

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Gedankenexperimente

Posted on April 15, 2012 | Leave a comment

Do you ever have that great moment or feeling when you finally find the name for that thing you think other people think makes you a weirdo?

I do and I found it the other day:

A while back, Sam introduced us to Trolley Problems. I refer to Trolley Problems as a proper noun, since it’s a category of thought-experiments (Gedankenexperimente) that I will be using to test our moral intuitions vis-à-vis euvoluntary exchange.

And it’s real:

A thought experiment or Gedankenexperiment (from German) considers some hypothesis, theory, or principle for the purpose of thinking through its consequences. Given the structure of the experiment, it may or may not be possible to actually perform it, and, in the case that it is possible for it to be performed, there need be no intention of any kind to actually perform the experiment in question. The common goal of a thought experiment is to explore the potential consequences of the principle in question.

Ahhh, it makes all the difference just to know.

 

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